What a way to start Monday.

Monday morning, Tessa and I went hiking near Anaheim Hills. I am trying to lose weight, so I was all about this idea. Then we actually started hiking and I regretted ever waking up. But through this hike I realized that these past years I have constantly be selling myself short. I have never really pushed myself because I didn't believe I was capable of doing more. When I gained a lot of weight, I told myself this was just how I would look from now on. I didn't think I would be able to lose it and I wasn't even willing to try. Every hill that we came across, I said to myself, "I know I can do this." I felt myself completely defying my nature of saying, "I will never be able to do this." And you know? I totally made it. Every time I saw a hill and told myself I could do it, I did it.
This is not to say that it wasn't hard. It was incredibly hard for me because I am still very overweight. (And I do remember telling Tessa, "Just right now, I hate you." Her response? "I was prepared for that.") But I did it, and now I want to do it again because I know that I can, and I can no longer tell myself I am not good enough when I know that I am.

4 comments:

lenoracle said...

I know the feeling, I've been struggling with my weight for years. But I can moreso relate with quitting smoking right now. For so long I just accepted smoking in my life as a definition of what I am, telling myself I could never quit. Now I'm on the patch, it's been 4 days, and while it's rough it's alot easier than I thought!

We do often times sell ourselves short because it's the easy way out. But glad to hear you perservered! Can't wait for some pictures of your next hike. : )

Alanah said...

Although I haven't smoked, I think losing weight is a similar battle, so I'm glad you understand.

Good luck on quitting!

JMay said...

I love hikin! Indeed a perfect way to start a Monday :-)

Alison said...

proud of you!