Give me a break, I'm emotional.

I need a good release right now. I'm sorry if none of this makes sense, but give me a break, I'm emotional. Today was the second orientation meeting for hospice. I am not sure if I told any of my friends that I was doing this. My mom has been volunteering for Companion Hospice for eight years, and I have loved hearing her stories and experiences. Since I would like to pursue a career path in social work with older people, I thought it would be a great place to volunteer. In case any of you don't know (many people don't) hospice is a health care facility for people who are terminally ill and have less than six months to live. So, being a volunteer, I would go to people's houses or nursing homes and sit with them for a few hours a week. Mainly, I am there to let them know that someone cares for them and wants to make their death as easy as possible. A lot of these people have issues to resolve and are very scared and I am there to listen to them. Going to the orientations has made me even more excited to do this, but I am also scared. I'm pretty emotional, and the first meeting made me want to cry, just listening to these people's stories. The second meeting was today, and every person in the room had tears in their eyes at some point. It was intense. We had a speaker talk about family dynamics and the hospice patient's family and how it can affect your care. A fellow volunteer and dear man, Leo, spoke up. I first have to introduce Leo. When I walked in the door the first time, he came right up to me, shook my hand and introduced himself. He is in his sixties and has a little hunch on his back, but he is by far the happiest person I have ever had the pleasure to meet. The lines branching out from the corners of his eyes can tell you: This man lives his life smiling. He is from Indonesia and currently works at a senior citizen center. He shared a story about a father who was in his care and was dying. The only thing he wanted before he died was for his son to visit him and sing one of his favorite songs. But, the son and father had a strained relationship and the son despised his father. Leo told him about his father's wishes, and the son refused to sing this song. The best he would offer was to be in the room while Leo sang this man his song. So, Leo did it. And as he is telling this story, he starts to sing the song. And as he is singing, his voice falters and he starts to break down remembering the details. Yet, he finishes the song for us. It was probably one of the most powerful things I have ever seen. This man is so incredible. And the rest of the class went about the same way. It's been so emotional! Besides that, I just did my taxes with my dad, and I owe $122, which may not seem like a lot of money to anyone else, but I am currently making about $50 a week AND trying to save $1000 by the end of May for Italy. So, I'm feeling extremely emotional, but not necessarily in a bad way. I feel like I could cry at the drop of a hat, but I know that if I do, it will be a good cry. Because all this talk of death and money and everything just makes me think of my Savior. I have no reason to worry about ANYTHING. I don't have to worry about dying. I don't have to worry about money. I have committed my life to Christ and His work, which means I will be taken care of. No matter what.